Humor #452

“Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time – I think I’ve forgotten this before.”

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 The loaded mini-van pulled into a campsite. Four children leaped from the vehicle and began feverishly unloading gear and setting up the tent. The boys rushed to gather firewood, while the girls and their mother set up the camp stove and cooking utensils.

A nearby camper marveled to the youngsters’ father, “That, sir, is some display of teamwork.”

The father replied, “I have a system: no one goes to the bathroom until the camp is set up.”

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One day, I taught my young class the story of Jesus visiting Mary and Martha. I carefully explained how Martha had hurried to clean the house and cook a special meal. Then I paused and asked, “What would you do if Jesus was going to visit your house today?” One little girl quickly responded, “I’d put the Bible on the table!”

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The HMO account manager noticed that nearly every bill from a certain pediatrician’s office included the line item “Behavior modification reinforcers.”

Alarmed that the pediatrician was engaging in some unapproved, experimental psychological treatment, she called the physician’s office to inquire, “What on earth are behavior modification reinforcers?”

“Lollipops,” was the reply.

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A shy little 4-year-old came in to the dentist for his first cleaning and check-up.

The hygienist tried to strike up a conversation but no response.

After the cleaning, the dentist was called in to do the final check.

The dentist tried to strike up a conversation as well.

“How old are you?” No response.

The dentist then asked, “Don’t you know how old you are?”

Immediately four tiny fingers went up.

“Oh,” replied the dentist, “and do you know how old that is?”

Four little fingers went up once again.

Continuing the effort to get a response, the dentist asked, “Can you talk?”

The solemn little patient looked at him and asked, “Can you count?”

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