humor #463

A student burst into his professor’s office and says; “Professor Stigler, I don’t believe I deserve this F you’ve given me.”

To which Stigler replied, “I agree, but unfortunately it is the lowest grade the University will allow me to award.”

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Husband: I just saw a very beautiful woman.

Wife: Really? Then what happened?

Husband: I just kept on admiring her, on and on…

Wife (getting irritated): WHAT happened then?

Husband smiled and said: You’re still here!

 —–

Did you hear about the guy who went to the dentist to get new dentures?

His insurance was denied and he only had a dollar on him… so he wound up with buck teeth.

——

A fine is a tax for doing something wrong.

A tax is a fine for doing something right.

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A man and his wife were sitting in the living room discussing a “Living Will”

“Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.”

His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all the beer.

—–

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