Humor # 573

Dieting – New Year Resolutions

2015: I will get my weight down below 180 pounds.

2016: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200 pounds.

2017: I will develop a realistic attitude about my weight.

2018: I will work out 3 days a week.

2019: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.


I went to my Doctor and he suggested I do some exercises. Here is my new regiment…

  1. Jump to conclusions
  2. Climb the walls
  3. Drag my heels
  4. Push my luck
  5. Make mountains out of molehills
  6. Bend over backwards
  7. Run in circles
  8. Put my foot in my mouth