Humor #603

I’m not so sure about an inner child, but I have an inner idiot that surfaces every now and then.

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“You call this a musical?” asked Les miserably.

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I was born to be wild, but only until around 9 pm or so.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me!! Luckily, my injuries were only super fish oil.

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Don’t wear headphones while vacuuming; I’ve just finished the whole house before realizing the vacuum wasn’t plugged in.

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I gave all my dead batteries away today … free of charge.

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The relationship between Husband and Wife is very psychological; one is Psycho and the other is Logical – and whatever you do, don’t try to figure out Who is Who.

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I just ordered a life alert bracelet so if I ever get a life I’ll be notified immediately

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To the guy who invented “zero” … Thanks for nothing.

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