I was the substitute teacher for a second-grade math class that was learning about groups. In one exercise, pupils were asked to label a group of items according to their common characteristics.
Pictured were onion rings, doughnuts, a bundt cake, and ring cookies. The correct answer would have been that all the items have holes in the center.
But one health-conscious boy’s response was, “All of those things contain too much cholesterol.”
A grandmother overheard her 5-year-old granddaughter “playing wedding.”
The wedding vows went like this:
“You have the right to remain silent, anything you say may be held against you, you have the right to have an attorney present. You may kiss the bride.”
Interviewer: So what do you have planned for the future?
Interviewer: No, I mean long term.
Me: Oh… Dinner.
We were eating corn on the cob two weeks ago and my 5-year-old daughter Rachel seemed to be struggling with it a little bit.
I said “Rachel, eat it like a typewriter.”
She looked at me with pure innocence in her eyes and said “Mommy, what’s a typewriter?”