Humor #796

Short Ones

Nigerian man found dead in his apartment with $45 million in cash. He spent the last 10 years trying to share it, but no one replied to his emails.

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My wife told me she didn’t understand the science behind cloning. I replied, “That makes two of us.”

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A short nap once in awhile can prevent old age… especially while driving.

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Why is it you never hear of someone doing something out of an UNDER abundance of caution?

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I think my wife has been putting superglue on my water gun collection. She denies it but I’m sticking to my guns.

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I just killed a huge spider running across the floor with my shoe. I don’t care how big the spider is, no one steals my shoe.

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Give a man a gun and he’ll rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he’ll rob everyone.

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The English Language is weird. It can be understood through tough thorough thought though.

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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day. But I couldn’t find any.

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I’m single by choice; Someone else’s choice.