Humor #796

Short Ones

Nigerian man found dead in his apartment with $45 million in cash. He spent the last 10 years trying to share it, but no one replied to his emails.

My wife told me she didn’t understand the science behind cloning. I replied, “That makes two of us.”

A short nap once in awhile can prevent old age… especially while driving.

Why is it you never hear of someone doing something out of an UNDER abundance of caution?

I think my wife has been putting superglue on my water gun collection. She denies it but I’m sticking to my guns.

I just killed a huge spider running across the floor with my shoe. I don’t care how big the spider is, no one steals my shoe.

Give a man a gun and he’ll rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he’ll rob everyone.

The English Language is weird. It can be understood through tough thorough thought though.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day. But I couldn’t find any.

I’m single by choice; Someone else’s choice.