Humor #508

Honest Toy Disclaimers

* No beanies or babies harmed in the manufacture of this product.

* Warning: This fad will disappear in 6 weeks.

* Caution: Care Bears do not actually care very much.

* Warning: This toy produces substantially less childish glee in real life than it does in the TV commercial.

* Do not purchase this toy at all. Put it back on the shelf! NOW!! Just walk away, timid little man.

* Do not stare at product. Hey! You’re doing it now! Cut that out!!

* In case of breakage, scream until dad buys a replacement.

* Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously.

* Use as an actual terrorist device not recommended.

* Do not attempt to combine your Ultra Mega Warrior with your cat to make Ultra Mega Cat Warrior.

* NOTE: The makers of “Queen Amidala’s Naboo Dream Palace” assume no responsibility for the quality of the movie which spawned it.

* Some assimilation required. Resistance is futile.

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