I used to be conceited, but now I am perfect.
A newspaper writer, after working for 17 long years, was finally granted two months leave, during which time he would be fully paid. However, he turned down his boss’ kind offer.
The boss asked, “Why would you turn down such a generous offer?”
The newspaper writer said there were 2 reasons.
“Well, what are they?” asked the boss.
“The first,” he said, “is that I thought that my taking such a long leave might affect the newspaper’s circulation.”
The boss asked him what the other reason was.
“The other reason,” replied the writer, “is that I thought my taking such a long leave might NOT affect the newspaper’s circulation.”
Letter of Rejection of Rejection Letter
Dear [Interviewer’s Name]:
Thank you for your letter of _________.
After careful consideration, I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your firm. This year I have had been particularly fortunate in receiving an unusually large number of rejection letters. With such a varied and promising field of candidates, it is impossible for me to accept all refusals.
Despite [Firm’s Name]’s outstanding qualifications and previous experience in rejecting applicants, I find that your rejection does not meet with my needs at this time. Therefore, I will initiate employment with your firm immediately following graduation. I look forward to seeing you then.
Best of luck in rejecting future candidates.
Old man walks up and says, “For sixty years I’ve been trying to figure out why we vote in November. Finally found the answer this year.”
“Better selection of turkeys!”
A football coach was asked his secret of evaluating raw recruits.
“Well,” he said, “I take ’em out in the woods and make ’em run. The ones that go around the trees, I make into running backs. The ones that run into the trees, I turn into linemen.”