Humor #220

Malapropisms

(For those who might not know, a malapropism is a verbal blunder in which one word is replaced by another similar in sound but different in meaning.)

People who live beyond their means should act their wage.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don’t stand in her way.

The image of you playing Frisbee with a dog isn’t so farfetched.

The wise never marry, and when they marry, they become otherwise.

He’s a wolf in cheap clothing.

It was a case of love at Versailles.

He’s got one of those sight-seeing dogs.

In Algiers, they spend most of their time at the cash bar.

My sister has extra-century perception.

A fool and his money are some party.

All’s fear in love and war.

Nip it in the butt.

Some viruses can lie doormat for years.

To each his zone.

Michelangelo painted the Sixteenth Chapel.

No more negotiating – it’s a dumb deal.

It’s a long road to hold.

All I want from you kids is a little piece of quiet.

Perforation is a rip off.

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
A Roaming Catholic.

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